top of page

How Inconsistency Affects your Relationship



Many people desire to have relationships with a strong foundation. They like to feel like they can count on their partner for anything without a doubt. Being able to depend on your significant other is essential. It’s an unspoken requirement. They’re an automatic emergency contact. When you can’t bet on your partner to answer when you call, you may have more problems that you realize.


Inconsistency may be a major issue in your relationship. It’s a trait that nobody wants to claim or be attached to. Inconsistency is not behaving in the same manner over time. A person’s actions change in similar situations. They can be unpredictable and conflicting, leading to a great deal of confusion. Frustration plays a role when you are dating someone who fits this shoe.


Let’s discover the red flags to determine if you’re dating an inconsistent person.



1. Dishonesty


When your partner constantly tells you lies, whether big or small, their credibility goes down. You may find yourself always questioning them or yourself. They could make you seem like you’re overanalyzing, but you probably are following your gut feeling that something is off. The gut never lies.


2. Excuses


They have a reason to justify things that they are supposed to do or not. This kind of person has an answer for everything. Half of the time, it doesn’t make sense. Those excuses are used to deflect from the truth and hold themselves accountable.


3. Effortless


They do not make efforts to make you happy or show up for you. This behavior reveals inconsideration as well. They do not care how their actions make you feel. They don’t respect your time when they usually show up late. It’s a one-way street and they do not reciprocate what you put into the relationship. They don’t believe they have to take the extra step to sustain your interest.


4. Flaky


Being inconsistent indirectly forms a bad pattern of behavior. They continue to cancel or change plans, which upsets you. You become afraid to ask them for a date night to guard your feelings. Although their history has shown you who they are, you still have hope that the next time will be different. You wish that they were like you and that keeps you on the hook to stick around.


Now that you’ve learned more about inconsistency, become more aware of those characteristics. They shouldn’t be a part of your relationship. If they are, you may lose trust in your partner. You can’t believe their words and you don’t have faith that they will deliver. It causes you to feel down and disappointed in them. You probably sense they could do better, but they have not proved you wrong. Their moods and actions are unpredictable. You find yourself walking on eggshells and avoiding conversions to relieve your anxiety.

This unnecessary stress weighs heavy on your shoulders. You keep hitting dead ends and don’t know where to turn. As a result, you can’t rely on them. Eventually, you don’t invite them to go out or to join your holiday celebrations. Your relationship is in a rut and you’re helpless. It’s frustrating to date a person of this nature as it drains you trying to figure out the reasons. All these inconsistencies cause cracks in your foundation. It affects your intimacy. When your partner doesn’t perform outside of the bedroom, you don’t have a desire to be sexual and affectionate. Once you remove those aspects, your connection fades. You don’t enjoy their company since it seems so difficult for them to commit to spending time when they say they will.


It is exhausting to deal with a person that isn’t fully committed. You can’t help but question your future and if you’re wasting your time. When a person doesn’t completely invest their time to build a life together, they might not be the right fit. You have to decide what you want. Here are ways for your partner to be consistent. Offer these suggestions and see if anything changes before making any final decisions.

  1. Frequent communication that must involve phone conversations versus only text messaging. Hearing each other’s voice enhances your connection.

  2. Being supportive makes one feel secure and loved. Actively listen and comfort them.

  3. Don’t cancel plans to rebuild trust. Commit to having one date night a month.

  4. Learn your partner’s likes and dislikes. Do more of the good and less of the bad.

  5. Let actions match behavior every time.

  6. Be grateful for all the little things.


Being consistent solidifies your connection. It boosts your hormones to fall for your partner all over again. Your intimacy should increase as your endorphins explode. Try new things around your city to revamp your partnership. Test out various things sexually to enhance your love life. This is sure to bring you closer. Making small changes and being self-conscious will reintroduce happiness. Commit to being consistent and transparent with communication. Check in with your partner often to make sure you’re on the same page with love, career, and life. Your goals should align. Always re-evaluate your relationship to ensure you’re being treated like the goddess you are. And if not, glow on!



57 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


bottom of page